Posted by: Nici | 15 September, 2011

Are our children being spoiled with expensive gifts and designer clothes, at the expense of a loving family life? via the Brentwood Gazette

Yesterday my local newspaper published the below article which prompted me to blog about a personal situation I have recently experienced. Whilst I appreciate that some parents do lavish expensive gifts on their children as a means of showing love, does it apply to everyone? As a busy parent who is a full time student at university, my life can be very busy at times. I thought I would treat my 15yr son to say thank you for being so supportive during my first year at uni and as an ‘I’m sorry’ present for being so busy. This treat was an xbox 360 with a couple of games. This was the first big present I have ever brought him outside of Christmas and birthday and I wanted to spoil him. Most people think that this was a lovely thing to do, and didn’t in anyway substitute a loving family life. However, there have been some people who quite obviously disapproved.

So now I am wondering why I feel the need to justify myself.. I worked for 13 years in a job I disliked because it had child friendly hours so I was able to pick my son up from school every day and spend all evening with him. I have been single for quite a while now, by my own choice, so that I could dedicate all my time and energy purely to my son. It wasn’t until he was 14 that I decided to go back to education to get the training I needed to have a job that I wanted to do, not one that simply suited my lifestyle at the time.

My son and I are blessed with a wonderful relationship, to the envy of his friends, three of which call me ‘mum’ and turn to me with their problems. We spend a lot of time talking, laughing and just simply spending time together as a family. He pretty much tells me everything, very much to the amusement of my dad, and turns to me and listens to me when he has problems. He even rings me on his way home from school for a chat and to tell me about his day! ❤

So, am I a bad parent buying my son’s love with an xbox? Or am I simply showing him how much I appreciate his support, understanding and the relationship we have?

Are our children being spoiled with expensive gifts and designer clothes, at the expense of a loving family life?



  1. I grew up having a very close relationship with my mum and my sister, and I still have this relationship with them today. They are my best friends. I don’t believe that you have bought his love. This is definitely a sign of appreciation. xx

  2. Thank you lovely x

  3. There is nothing wrong in saying thankyou every so often , knowing you as I do yourrelationship with your son is amazing and it is your life now and he will always come first he knows that but the support he has shown you Is amazing and those who disagree with rewarding him forbid support need to look at their relationships with their children x

  4. Thanks Di, your message means a lot x

  5. This actually answered my downside, thanks!

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